Well, it's the 31st May and 5 full months since I started this project- Me! So I've been doing a bit of a stock take. And some good things and some not so good! In short, too much thinking and not enough doing!

Having looked at the last few months, my ups and my downs. The downs are because I've allowed myself to become paralysed. That four letter word FEAR!I've allowed the FEAR to stop me from doing things.

I've definitely been doing 1 and not 2!

So, what should I do?As I said I've been doing a stock take, looking at my ups and my downs. When I look at my ups I've become a lot more aware of myself. I've realised that I don't communicate very well; in that I expect people to understand without me telling them everything!!? I make grand assumptions which are usually wrong! I have learnt to expect to fail. I don't try in case I fail and therefore I fail!(really?! yes really)I don't like unknowns and would rather accept a known failure than an unknown win!

SO I've decided ...I don't want to live like that any more!

I want the 'best of me' to be the person that decides what I do, how I act and what is good for me.

 

I need to listen to that person who looks back at me in the mirror because when I look deep, I can see what's right for me, because I do know what to do and I don't need to be scared. I also realised that somewhere along the line I've learnt that it's not a good thing to ask for help- it's a sign of weakness.

I was watching something the other day about getting what you want and the person said that it's important to start doing stop thinking and start doing. If you have started and have something tangible in front of you then someone can help, whereas if you just think about it no one can help as they are just thoughts in your head.