I've had a good year and in the same vein that I approached my summer holiday, I have decided to reclaim Christmas for myself.
What do you mean, you ask? Well, For the last few Christmases it's been a huge reminder of what I haven't got, and a rebellion against those things which are Christmassey, due to the pain of not having, and never going to have, children.
As for this year, becasue I am beginning to heal and move on, I have decided to accept those things which I like because I like them and want them in my life.
So I took part in the crib project in school. Each child and member was invited to create a crib to celebrate Christmas. So I put my creative talents to the test and made a crib out of wire. It gave me great pleasure to be creative and make something. I also enjoyed seeing something through to completetion, a skill I developed over the summer.
The next thing I did was to make a wreath for our door.I'd always admired them but didn't think they were worth the money that shops were charging for them. I had a vague idea of how to go about it; so I bought a wire ring and used some beads, ribbon and 'greenery' from the garden. And, if I say so myself it looks okay!
The next thing I have done is by presents for a child. My hubby's daughter gave birth earlier this year. So I have a grandson to buy for. When we asked what he wanted for Christmas, we were told that he wanted a light projector which projects lights on to the wall or a large play mat. Having trolled the internet, I have found both and purchased both. It was weird to buy gifts for a child as it's something I'd desperately wanted to to do in the past but never had anyone to buy for.
I also decided to tell my mum that we were having a grown up Chiristmas. Because she wanted Grandchildren she has bought me gifts which ar very childish in a way. But it's no fun being the 40year old child! So we're having a grown up Chirstmas!! Less is more!! And I'm calling the shots!
Happy Christmas!
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